The people who keep asking me when I’m going to get married/breed.
Can you all please kindly fek off?
I actually don’t know how many times I have to explain to the same people that I couldn’t be arsed about marriage. I’m not religious so I don’t have a problem with “living in sin” so marriage for that reason is out of the way. I don’t WANT to do the whole church and bridesmaids and flowers bollocks, it’s fine for those that want it but I don’t. We don’t feel the need to celebrate our love with a giant party either. So really, there’s no reason for us to get married. So we aren’t going to. Right?
The only way we will get married is to make it a fuck off fun event and go and do a theme wedding in vegas. That’s just the kind of people we are. And if you’re going to take the piss like that then, why bother?
We’ve had a great relationship for five years now and it works, I don’t need a ring to validate that.
Then…the breeding thing.
Christ.
I say I don’t ever want kids. I told the Boyfriend after our 2 year anniversary that things are looking pretty serious so I decided to lay down the law – he got told that if he ever wants kids then I’m not the person for him and he can just leave when that day happens. If he wants to breed then he should go and find someone that wants the same thing. Since he stuck around you can guess that he also doesn’t like the idea.
Anyway, people keep telling me I WILL change my mind. Fuck me this pisses me off. I don’t deny that there is a small chance that in the future I may change my mind, it happens. But don’t tell me with absolutely no doubt in your voice that I will undoubtedly change my mind about wanting to breed. Just because it’s what you want doesn’t make it what I want.
And my god, what’s the rush? I’m 24 for Christ’s sake, I have time! We barely make enough money at the moment to get by and you want me to rush off and get knocked up? Are you out of your tiny little mind? And no offence but, if I had to breed I would want to spoil the crap out of that kid and give it the best of everything…if I can’t do that just yet then I’m not going to.
Then there’s the fact that I don’t really like children. Babies are ugly to me, I don’t see the appeal. Toddlers make too much noise. Past the age of five they’re just too opinionated and a pain in the ass. Of course this all means that they love me and I’m actually really good with them but that’s not the point.
Also considering the type of person I am…I would have a kid, give it a cool hippie name and then end up with the most conservative and annoying child ever.
Breeding would also mean having to see the Boyfriends mother more often and like, I really don’t want to do that.
So..on that note…fuck you all and your ideals. I will stay non silly – and wrap the willy. And you know, cut out my ovaries.
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I think it’s a combination of “misery loves company” and “b-but, that’s just how it’s supposed to be”. Applying rational thought to the matter just isn’t done.
I want to print this post and keep it …As BP..
And try not to do anything drastic with the eggs.. you may find a need for them at some point.. just saying.. rather just keep the willy under wraps like..
You can put a black willy wrapper on it.. call it mike and have a “Mike Nite” … far more civilised..
Happy Days chez Goblin then?
You are young. There is no hurry.
But, of course, you will change your mind.
B – I enjoy the glow in the dark wrappers. They make things so much more amusing.
6k – How about I just steal one of yours for a week to get it out of my system when the time comes?
Twenty four with kids! WTF!?? I left SA to go backpacking at 24. The best years of my life were between 24 and 30… get out there, have some fun, sow your seeds (or whatever chicks do). Kids can wait.
I have 2 now and I enjoy them so much now that I am a “little bit older”… so save your ovaries for when your mind’s not too clouded by others’ needs.
That’s what I’m saying man! People are in waaaaay too much of a rush.
Nutcases.
Why the heck would anyone suggest you breed (or get married) at 24. Good glory – at 36 I am still telling people who ask me when I am going to start breeding to go and get … well you can imagine the rest.
I think it makes them uncomfortable that we’ve been in a relationship for five years and have no plans. People dig their plans yeah?
Fan-fucking-tabulous post, lady. And I so agree wif you: kids are an expensive nuisance. How do they expect us to wear pretty dresses *and* have kids?
Nope, can’t do.