The evil eye of the past

So…I was thinking. People want more personal stories, and, well, my friend died. With him being worm food and all now, a whole bunch of memories made themselves known.

In other words…

Welcome to the walk down memory lane.

So there I was, ten years ago, 14 and ready to really get going on the whole rebelling thing. I mean, up until this point the only thing I’d done was take up smoking and sneak the occasional drink. And then the perfect opportunity arose.

It was a friends older sister’s 21st birthday coming up.

Long story short, I met my dead friend, who I shall call Runt from here on out. I’m calling him Runt because well, he was skinny as fuck and like the runt of the litter. I thought this at the time too but oh my god was he charming. As an unarmed 14 year old in this new and strange world of dealing with the opposite sex on a different level than playing cricket or pulling hair…the charm may have won me over.

Over the next week Runt and I spent every night being morons on the phone. Technically, he had no excuse since he was actually 18 at the time. So illegal. What a little whore he was.

Then came the day out at Ratanga Junction. It was like the best day ever. We had fun on the rides, had completely disgusting amounts of PDA’s (Public displays of affection for the idiots in the crowd) and well, I was smitten.

Actually, I was probably more than smitten. I was that really annoying girl at school who had nothing better to do than draw stupid little heart doodles and talk about her oh so cool older boyfriend. I would have slapped me.

Thank god it only lasted the long long time of one month. We all know how long that was back then.

As boyfriends go, the Runt was my first and one of the best. Charming, sweet and always remembered how to treat a girl. Of course this put a cramp in my rebellious stage. I wanted someone my parents would hate. Not someone my dad thought was the funniest person on the planet.

Yes I did the dumping. Just one of those I regret dumping actually.

But we stayed good friends…and even had encounters in the later years when things weren’t so PG.

OH MY FUCKING GOD THIS WAS THE GAYEST POST I HAVE EVER WRITTEN…

I am so sorry.