It’s a comic book themed Fluck Fliday!
Hooks in the Batcave
While this isn’t actually anything spectacularly special or going to compel you to spew rainbow chunks it’s just such a cool phrase. Imagine saying it: “I’m going to get my hooks in the batcave tonight” BAM! You added 10 points to your awesome score.
If you haven’t figured it out yet, it means to stimulate the vagina using your fingers. Hooks = fingers and Batcave = vagina because you know, any comic book fan would love to get into the batcave some day and many vaginas are just as unattainable to them.
Wonder Woman It
Requires a willing male and female. The female must enjoy giving oral sex.
The female of the species needs to perform oral sex on the willing male. Moments before ejaculation he will be required to perform the almighty task of pulling his penis out of her mouth. He will then need to ejaculate on her forehead and immediately cover the ejaculation with a bandana. If you’re lucky, she will stand up and make a stereotypical irate pose, i.e. put her hands on her hips. She will now resemble wonder woman but we do urge you not to point this out otherwise she may unleash her powers on you and bring on the pain.
Have a great weekend guys 
Just for you Sheena. I tried chicken, I may have failed.
What a crazy couple of years this has been.
My loveable eccentric mother did some cradle robbing and bagged herself a toy boy. They got married about 2 years ago. I’ll give her credit, he’s not bad looking but I sure hope he’ll be able to take care of her while she’s being scatterbrained Renee. He’s a minor league baseball player and travels around a lot to find paying gigs though which of course means that mom wanted to travel with him. She couldn’t do it with me around so I made the selfless sacrifice of moving myself to Charlies house in Forks.
Forks is a town so bleak that it actually needs 3 pages of adjectives emphasising it’s bleakness. I just don’t have the time though. Also, Charlie is actually my dad, but I called him Charlie back then to emphasise how our relationship was limp and broken and how it is now wonderful and filled with rainbows whenever I call him Daddy.
There is a whole bunch of other crap that I can tell you about me but it hardly matters, just imagine you and I share every single personality trait and quality because, you know, us girls are all the same really. What really matters is Edward Cullen.
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I really do.
I want to start getting certain juices flowing again. They’ve been out of practice for a while and I’m feeling the consequences. I need inspiration and I need to start flexing my brain a bit to start seeing inspiration in everything so…this is where you come in with as little or as much input as you want.
All you need to do is leave a comment with a suggestion for a genre I should do a short story on, a word or sentance it should revolve around, a link to an image I should use somewhere…whatever. Hell, you can even email me your genre/word/picture at ihaveanawesomeidea@goblintalk.co.za
Thank you kindly.
A couple of weeks ago I was fucking around on twitter and generally making a nuisance of myself – as I do – when I saw mention of ZAGlamour and their writing contest. As one of their winners mentions, a way to generate content for free. Thing is though, it works because there are more of us writers these days than there are ants at a picnic and so, some of us who don’t have the polish of larny copywriting degrees will do anything to have our words appear anywhere. Even generate content for someone else for absolute free while working a day job. We’re like the new breed of actors but less attractive and bony.
Over a half an hour lunch period, I was in a particularly silly mood and ended up writing something for this contest. Mainly because I’m all bitter and bitchy over the rise of my anonymous ramblings as opposed to those that actually have my name on. Now I shall re-use that contest entry here because it means I don’t have to generate fresh content for a day.
By the way, I really do apologise for the depths to which this sinks. I even sent an apology in the email with my entry. I’m courteous like that.
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Apparently I need more girl friends. I was told today that geeking out with boys all the time is completely wrong and I should find some girls I can stand…in Cape Town…and giggle and gossip and misbehave.
Now let’s pretend I was interested in this exercise and was actually going to do it. How the hell do you go about making good friends when you’re 26, in the City of the Clique and don’t do book clubs? And why do I supposedly have to?
Odd.
